It is once again our offday obligation to touch on what is happening in the rest of the league.
It's almost like visiting the zoo.
We can observe their awkward movements and strange ways from afar, never having to dirty ourselves in their strange, strange lands.
Don't talk too loudly and, of course, don't tap the glass.
First up:
As if flinging feces for a living wasn't enough, The Wings decided that it was their job to beat both Ilya and Our Boyfriend Wojtek Wolski.
It was - for the record - not.
The series is now tied 2-2, so the boys have a chance to get it back. And we can only pray that they do it, because the Coyotes winning would be almost as thrilling as seeing the Wings sent home in the first round.
Next stop.
In the battle of Fat v. Fat, Fat won 4-1 yesterday. That particular Fat being Philadelphia.
We care less and less about this series the more it happens, just because we hate Uncle Daddy oh so much.
But now it's 3-1 in Philly's favor, so we're sure that means something to someone.
Our sympathy playoff beard is growing on the face of an individual who hails from Jersey so I guess we have to throw some lovin' his way.
Officially not rooting against the Debs.
We'll have photos of that beard as soon as the Pens finish up the Sens.
Just around the corner, past the picnic pavilions,
Wait, hold on. I'm not sure what the official PH position on this one is other than Versteeg looking like the gayest fairy to ever nance down the pike.
Let me check.
Okay, yeah, it's exactly what it should be. We're taking the position of "confused."
For me, this is rooted in the fact that all of my Blackhawks apparel is in a cardboard box back in Pittsburgh with large frowny faces that were drawn onto it in a fit of rage. It is not to be opened until a certain individual stops ruining one of my once-favorite teams.
The Preds store wouldn't open for us when we went to visit it in Nashville, but the arena did welcome us to a Professional Bull Riding event where cowboys tried to pick us up. We like it when NHL teams facilitate cowboy hookups, so really, what can we say?
Go Preds?
They're leading 2-1, so yeah, fuck it, go Preds.
And now, it's Timmy's favorite!
2-1?!?!?!?!
San Jose!
You tied a series!
It's really all we want for Christmas, for you to finally make it somewhere in the playoffs. Not too far, of course. We don't want to come to regret these words. But seriously boys, do it.
Not that we don't love the Avs and really respect them and wish the best for them, but we just want JoeJoe to do SOMETHING with his life other than suck at making toast and being a ventriloquist in NHL commercials.
Today, we've seen such lovely creatures as,
The Bruins took care of the Sabres today and now lead the series 3-1.
We wish Zoe's city cared more, but really, hockey interest is incredibly low for a city comprised solely of rich white people.
Sucks, because Johnny Boychuk's lookin' kinda fly here.
*shrug* Their loss.
Take it home, Bruins.
And lastly,
Suck us.
Hold on, Habs.
Win three games in a row.
Get 'em, Hal.
Right now LA is leading Vancouver by one. We don't really know what animal they would be, but probably something incredibly worthless.
At the end of the day, we all know who reigns supreme.
Honor.
Oh, and click here if you have ovaries and want to die squealing in a fit of delight.
Love it.
Go Pens.
It's almost like visiting the zoo.
We can observe their awkward movements and strange ways from afar, never having to dirty ourselves in their strange, strange lands.
Don't talk too loudly and, of course, don't tap the glass.
First up:
As if flinging feces for a living wasn't enough, The Wings decided that it was their job to beat both Ilya and Our Boyfriend Wojtek Wolski.It was - for the record - not.
The series is now tied 2-2, so the boys have a chance to get it back. And we can only pray that they do it, because the Coyotes winning would be almost as thrilling as seeing the Wings sent home in the first round.
Next stop.
In the battle of Fat v. Fat, Fat won 4-1 yesterday. That particular Fat being Philadelphia.We care less and less about this series the more it happens, just because we hate Uncle Daddy oh so much.
But now it's 3-1 in Philly's favor, so we're sure that means something to someone.
Our sympathy playoff beard is growing on the face of an individual who hails from Jersey so I guess we have to throw some lovin' his way.
Officially not rooting against the Debs.
We'll have photos of that beard as soon as the Pens finish up the Sens.
Just around the corner, past the picnic pavilions,
Wait, hold on. I'm not sure what the official PH position on this one is other than Versteeg looking like the gayest fairy to ever nance down the pike.Let me check.
Okay, yeah, it's exactly what it should be. We're taking the position of "confused."
For me, this is rooted in the fact that all of my Blackhawks apparel is in a cardboard box back in Pittsburgh with large frowny faces that were drawn onto it in a fit of rage. It is not to be opened until a certain individual stops ruining one of my once-favorite teams.
The Preds store wouldn't open for us when we went to visit it in Nashville, but the arena did welcome us to a Professional Bull Riding event where cowboys tried to pick us up. We like it when NHL teams facilitate cowboy hookups, so really, what can we say?
Go Preds?
They're leading 2-1, so yeah, fuck it, go Preds.
And now, it's Timmy's favorite!
2-1?!?!?!?!San Jose!
You tied a series!
It's really all we want for Christmas, for you to finally make it somewhere in the playoffs. Not too far, of course. We don't want to come to regret these words. But seriously boys, do it.
Not that we don't love the Avs and really respect them and wish the best for them, but we just want JoeJoe to do SOMETHING with his life other than suck at making toast and being a ventriloquist in NHL commercials.
Today, we've seen such lovely creatures as,
The Bruins took care of the Sabres today and now lead the series 3-1.We wish Zoe's city cared more, but really, hockey interest is incredibly low for a city comprised solely of rich white people.
Sucks, because Johnny Boychuk's lookin' kinda fly here.
*shrug* Their loss.
Take it home, Bruins.
And lastly,
Suck us.Hold on, Habs.
Win three games in a row.
Get 'em, Hal.
Right now LA is leading Vancouver by one. We don't really know what animal they would be, but probably something incredibly worthless.
At the end of the day, we all know who reigns supreme.
Honor.Oh, and click here if you have ovaries and want to die squealing in a fit of delight.
Love it.
Go Pens.
