Sunday, February 14, 2010

mwah, mwah, mwah. a recap + some.

What a Valentines Day Gift.Hopefully some hottie in your life hooked you up with something a little more sexy for the occasion, because the lovejams weren't happening in Mellon Arena yesterday.
Not to say the game wasn't fought well or that it wasn't extremely entertaining, because that is simply not the case.
That hanging penguin photo just got into our press box and we couldn't help ourselves.
A polar bear got the same treatment.
People are so goddamn weird.
Anyway, sorry for the lateness of the past two recaps, we were all caught up in the celebration of a holiday created by women to steal men's money, and rightfully so.

We've got a lot of stuff to cover right now, so we're cashing in on a photo recap.

Gonch and Cappy make sweet sweet love in the first to get a power play goal, reminding us that things can't be all bad, all the time. Malks gets the secondary, meaning that he's had points in like, one trillion straight games. (13)

Malks takes some penalties for being naughty. Billy G helps him serve it out.
Martin Erat thinks he'll have some fun while there's a little bit of glass between him and certain death at the hands of Mister Billy and Malks, who clearly Has The Fire. Is the man like 5 feet tall? What the hell is wrong with him.

Mattie Cooke brings it back home by hanging out in the net and making sure he picked up the trash.
This game is making us a little woozy at this point. We have to get out some of our Valentines chocolates to deal.

SADKLFHJADSKJFHASDKJF TOOTOO CAN YOU NOT? CAN YOU JUST NOT?
Tootoo, I say.
We were given heart attacks by a man named Tootoo.
Also, can we point out that the Preds are not a good looking team? You get some sexy teams in hockey. Nashville does not act as home to one of them.
Then again, we have high standards in Pittsburgh.
Our Penguins are sort of top notch.
Bazinga.

PS - Fleury is being sick.

And then, of course, IT happened.
Brooks Orpik gets a sick one-timer off a faceoff, and it is the most beautiful thing. LOOK HOW HAPPY EVERYONE IS. Mellon starts chanting "USA!" The game recap includes the statement "Team USA's Orpik scored for the first time in 112 games"
TEAM USA'S ORPIK. Damn straight.
Mwah to you, Brooksie. We'd by you all the candy hearts in the world.

Shea Weber risks his life taking away Brooks's GWG. His days are numbered. Brooks is choosing carefully from his spice rack. We're preparing our best dinner outfits. Shea, I hope a nice port compliments you.

Overtime is all Penguins, no Penguins goals.
The SO is painful. Let's not talk about it.
Preds 4, Pens 3
Preds SO Win.
Fuck all ya'll.

ALT THREE STARS ARE CANCELED THIS GAME
BROOKS ORPIK IS THE FUCKING MAN


In other news, we have arrived at the Olympic break, and you should be celebrating.
Get your wallpaper on, compliments of the Pens website.

Sexy.

The boys are hoping to amp it up after the Olympics, obviously. Need we remember the hopes of turning shit around after the ASG last year?
It's the same theory.
We come back with a blank slate on which to kick ass.
Billy G knows what's up.
"I don't think anybody is satisfied right now," Penguins right wing Bill Guerin said. "We had better find another level after the break."
(Trib)

We can pause our Colby trade rumors, because the Olympic trade freeze has begun and no one's going anywhere until the gold is passed around.

Also, go and check out our favorite clothing provider, ladies.
Total new set of awesome lady tees.
$12 bucks a pop, and you're the stylinist bitch in town.


Seriously, they even have Gronk, Go-Go, Flower and more.
We're endlessly impressed by their designs, which can somehow manage to be totally cute and yet not glaringly sexist. The next puckbunny who can tell me who the Gronk is....well. It's not going to happen.
And of course, there's some good options to load up on in These Olympic Times in the men's section.
$10 bucks for some Canadian or Brooksie pride.

You know, we aren't actually secret PSR employees. We just sort of love and support the creation of cheap-as-hell shirts that support the boys. Check-check-check it out.
It's the best thing you can do with your lunch money.

And of course, the most important news:
President's Day

Our President, Stanley Cup Champion.

How are you celebrating this joyous President's Day?
The Olympics?
Brooksie's first goal?

Let us know. Especially if cupcakes are involved.

Go Pens.
Go USA.

13 comments:

Sophie29 said...

I was so upset when we lost that one. First loss in shootouts of the season ... bleh. By the way, great recap. and this website with Pittsburgh Clothing is just awesome ! Im gonna get some of those .. and, did you see -> http://penguins.nhl.com/club/news.htm?id=517734 some news about Curry haha

Need Ice In Phoenix said...

Did Brooksie pull out that tooth to look MORE scary or is he just trying to look like BillyG?

GO HOCKEY CANADA!
GO HOCKEY USA!
GO GENO & SARGE!

CrackerLilo said...

Figured that Valentine's Day would've been keeping y'all busy. I wish I'd seen more of the game, but I was so happy to see Orpik score that goal and hear the "USA! USA!" chants. Forget the official Penguins Olympics wallpaper--I'm using the picture of Guerin and Crosby celebrating with Orpik for a wallpaper.

I like those T-shirts, and it's probably a good thing for me that I didn't see any Billy G designs. You're right--cute and girly, but not insulting or so low-cut that you get frostbite in the arena. I liked the Orpik Department of Defense T-shirt, too. How fast is the shipping, I wonder...? And I really shouldn't be looking, 'cause I already bought myself a Team USA Womens' Hockey T-shirt and my Beloved a Team Russia Malkin T-shirt.

It's good that the Penguins not going to the Olympics see a problem or two to address. I already can't wait for March!

utterfrivolity said...

Have y'all seen this?

http://twitpic.com/13fdk3

My apologies if this has been posted in the comments previously and I missed it. But it's so unbelievably adorable, I think it deserves a spot in a post!

velarized alveolar lateral approximant said...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UuovEAk-aOk

"he's just a huge mammoth strong caveman type guy.-- just strength"

JStaal forever.

EyeHeartCandy said...

Oh shit! Free candy and free goals!!!! Woot woot. Too fucking bad they lost :-(
And what the hell happened to his teeth?
Those shirts are sooo cute! Theyre talkin to me. I might grab a Mad Max one. They need to make a Brooksy one. "Free Candy" with the heart, puck and 44. Would totally buy one in like .00000005 seconds. And his wallpaper is totally up on my laptop already.

Big Taste said...

I celebrated today by putting this picture on my front door for all to see. :D

I had my cousin with me all weekend which was fun to have a game-watching buddy with. Until they lost yesterday at which point he pointed his plastic gun at the tv screen and wailed "HOW COULD YOU LET US DOWN LIKE THAT FLEURY?!" He made up for that though when he said that Olli Jokinen looks like a burn victim. Kids say the darnest things.

Pip said...

I know the Gherkin anywhere - that penguin was hanged in London, my friends. My adopted city does not rock. They have no ice hockey. They play a mutated form of hockey on grass and their nets are about as wide as the world. There is no glass to bang on, no players are missing teeth. There is no plucky D-man that brings it, that gets me pregnant everytime he slams like a tank into another human being across open ice.

USA! USA! USA! I'm Australian. I change allegiances for such displays of awesomeness

Ashferddd said...

I have so many frickin' baking products in my kitchen right now. Get your butts to Pittsburgh and we'll have the craziest baking party I have ever thrown, as if my birthday and the Stanley Cup were bad enough. USA WOOOOOOOOOO

Megs said...

Was I dreaming of did Billy G say something about drinking margaritas during the Olympic Break? I could've sworn during either Friday's or Sunday's game in some interview they showed during the pre-game, he said something about having a few margaritas. All I can say is drink up. Maybe that's what will change shit around!

This is going to sound so weird, but I'm not too sad about the last two games. They were thrilling and crazy. I look on the bright side that at least we got a point from each. Being 2nd place in the division is pretty damn good compared to a year ago. I think the Devils will go down soon enough.

With trades, I saw somewhere on the net the idea of Colby coming back. I was surprised that some sports writer actually put that in the feature (maybe he reads the blog?). The one thing I've been thinking about is who should leave the team? The article pointed out that the weakest links were Gogo, Mark Eaton, and Feds. Any thoughts on that? I can see a valuable trade happen with Eaton. Not that I'm wishing him gone, but I'm just being realistic here. Also, does anyone else feel a bit frustrated with Gogo's performance? I feel frustrated with his work on the power play. When I noticed that a few weeks ago, I just got that gut feeling his number might be up :(

Now as for Olympic hockey...

I'm stoked, like seriously stoked for Jagr. I know he can be an ass, but there's something about him that still pulls on the heart strings a little kinda like an ex-boyfriend you love to sometimes hangout with even though you know he's sometimes bad for you. The fact the man has the hair again ( example - http://www.pittsburghlive.com/x/pittsburghtrib/sports/penguins/s_667359.html) is damn awesome. I doubt he'll bring much skill, but who knows.

@Need Ice - I think Brooksie is trying to up the anti with Billy G as to who can look and be more scary.

MarieMacCee said...

i may be alone in this-but I just got home from fat tuesday (mad beds minus incidental nudity, thank you very much) and I'm thinking puck huffers should recap mens skating. Think of the costumes!!!! The emotions!!! The references to sequins and the 70's!!!

It could be amazing.....

Jamie-Lynn said...

Gronk = Staal

Hopalong Cassidy said...

Of course Gronk = Staal. They were just saying that the general puckslut doesn't know that.

 
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