Wednesday, February 17, 2010

but we thought it was the powder room, sir

Hopefully someone will be here later with a forrealz post later today, but we just wanted to comment:
PROFESSOR KRONWALL IS VERY UNHAPPY THAT YOU BROKE INTO HIS NUCLEAR LABORATORY!!!!!

Sweden/Germany tied at 0 after 1 period.
DEUTSCHLAND MARCH!!!!!!!!

Edit: Sweden wins 2-0. Hard-fought though. Germany is the redheaded stepchild of the tournament so if they had a hard time with those guys then we should like our chances.

17 comments:

utterfrivolity said...

Kronwall's glasses make me wanna do him so bad, it's kinda ridiculous. Nggghhh.

Holly Jameson said...

Actually Kronwall's expression in that photo reads more to me as:

"Screw the nuclear laboratory, I'm pissed that all of our supermodels have already been bought off by you lousy Americans and then those damn Swedes beat us at hockey and they didn't even let us ride back to the Olympic village with their swimsuit bunnies. Very bitter!!"

Bradford said...

Jaromir Jagr has STILL got it! He just scored massive goal. There are two kinds of pens fans. Those who still love JJ and those who don't. I still love him so whatever to the haters hes still the man. I wish he would come back and play for the pens for league minimum like he promised he would do if mario asked him. He still has it and his goal tonight was vintage JJ!

Bradford said...

Now JJ just set up goal number two! O yeah go JJ go!

Bradford said...

I thought Sid gave me massive hockey orgasm with his o so pretty passes setting up Jerome but JJ is reminding me how much i miss the old pens. I love this new team but there is just something special about those first two cups. We had never been there before. The greatest player of all time was in his prime. It was magical. Some poet wrote about nostalgia ruining all memories or some shit but fuck that. I didn't make it magical looking back on it now. It was magical!

Bradford said...

Yes i just dated myself. You girls are too young! you were frickin zygotes when Mario was winning cups! Hey 30 is the new 20 so fuck all you young mofos! :)

MouthGuard said...

What's worse than watching Swedish hockey players - or looking at pictures of Swedish hockey players eating sardine sandwiches? Watching Swedish curlers - as in, people who engage in curling. Just disembowel me now. Put me out of my misery.

Ahh, yes - let the "massive hockey orgasm" debates begin! Behold these bitchin' MHO soundtracks for three hyped teams in Vancouver. Try clicking on these when each of these teams "scores", and see what happens:

Team USA

Team Sveeeeden

Team Canada

I'm still struggling to find just the right MHO anthem for Team Douche.

Megs said...

I didn't know that Kronwall wears glasses. There needs to be a salute to all the guys in the NHL who wears glasses!

So I heard a crazy rumor today while watching the Sweden game. It was during one of the intermissions. The annoying NBC commentators were gabbing and they said something about Jagr. They said about how he was gearing up for the game against Slovakia, and then I heard something about how he might be on an NHL team after the olympics. Something about playing during the playoffs stretch. First thing I thought was "HOLY CRAP!"

Now I know this doesn't sound like a big deal, but two things have now made me wonder. The first thing is that a friend of mine told me that the Caps got Federov to play for them towards the end of last season through a situation where he wanted to be in the NHL for a little while. The other thing is that Bradford's comment about JJ's promise is now making me really wonder. Is anyone thinking what I'm thinking? Fuck trades. Sign Jagr to play for the Pens March 1 until the end of the entire season. Think about it, he just turned 38, he's been saying stuff about how he might be old but still wants to relive some of the glory days, and he's grown back his classic mullet. All I can say is, "Dear Mario, You know you want to ask, so please do." Jagr is the fierce offensive guy we need. And one last thought, the man has never played on an NHL team that never didn't go to the playoffs. Clarification... He went to the playoffs each year he was in the NHL, regardless of who he played for.


Bradford - I love your comments. Seriously, I about jizzed my pants watching this game. The goal he scored was just beautiful. He played tough and I would hope he made Hossa cry lol. By the way, make sure to read what I posted above.

Though I was pretty young when the first two cups happened, I can relate a little to your nostalgia.

This will prove that I'm kinda old... Do you remember when Jagr used to do the weather for WDVE? God I wish I had that shit on tape. I also wish DVE would do something similar with Geno.

Bradford said...

@megs I didn't know JJ used to do the weather on WDVE. That's awesome. I agree it would be nice to see current pens doing fun stuff like that. As for the comment on JJ i mentioned, i can tell you he said that in an interview. He talked about how he owes everything to Mario and that if Mario called him and asked him to come back he would play for league minimum just because he feels he owes so much to the man. I don't know what the rules are regarding KHL players coming over and playing in the NHL for only a small part of the season. I know there is a general agreement which basically says both leagues promise not to pick off each others players and will honor each leagues contracts. As i understand it JJ is signed for a few more years with his team but there may be a way he can do both as you mentioned with regard to Federov.

There is no doubt JJ would love to win another cup and I think he prolly watched what the pens did last year and part of him wanted to be a part of it. If the KHL would allow it, there is no reason this couldn't happen. Even at 38 JJ still has a lethal wrist shot, worlds of experience and a clear passion for the game. He would instantly make our powerplay much better. Given our struggles on the PP this year it would make sense to make this deal if we could get him at the right price. He is way past his phase of wanting to be the center of attention. I think it would work a lot like it did when he first came into the league. Sid will continue to get all the attention as mario did which would take the pressure off of JJ and allow him to do his thing. Who would you rather have on Sids line? Billy G Kunitz or Jagr? I think the answer is clear. Jagr would be the first all star type winger for sid since Hossa and you saw the production he had with hossa on his line. With Sid feeding JJ pretty passes like mario used to do i think JJ could score a lot of goals and give us some real playoff depth at wing. There has been a lot of talk about getting selane and ray whitney but honestly id rather have JJ than those guys. Even though he played many years for NY and DC he will always be a pen at heart and hes a two cup winner. You can't find that kind of talent with that kind of experience very easily. Sure hes lost a step but then again so has selane and whitney. We don't need him to be his former self. If he could simply use his hockey sense and wicked wrist shot that would be enough to put us over the top i think.

I realize its prolly a dream but wasn't Mario coming out of retirement a dream too? It could happen and i think even the pens fans that don't like JJ anymore would come back the minute JJ scored a goal. Especially on the powerplay. So lets all hope that Mario makes that call and the KHL allowed it because if they did i don't see any reason why he wouldn't come back. You saw how he played yesterday against a very good team. He brushed off a first period where he was hit a ton and became very frustrated. I love seeing how he responded. His toughness and determination were clear and you simply can't have enough of that on your team!

Holly Jameson said...

@ MouthGuard

I simply LOVE the goal anthems! Bravo! Where did you FIND that guy??? I laughed so hard, and I thank you :)

mitchmcquaide said...

Wow, Disco Dan put on some weight.

Megan said...

Fun Olympic fact: according to the official Vancouver 2010, website Free Candy = legit. http://www.vancouver2010.com/olympic-hockey/athletes/brooks-orpik_ath1024110Yc.html

EHisCDN said...

someone mentioned Jagr doing the news and made me think of this:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8Vqsbvry2DM&feature=related

Bradford said...

I am feeling positively giddy! The USA mens hockey team got another nice win today AND my Malkin blue authentic jersey came in the mail. What is so special about this? Well it came from a Chinese connection and only cost 40 bucks! It was the real deal too. Even had the Reebok authentic tags on it. Yep that's right. A jersey which should have cost me 300 bucks i got for 40 and its flawless. Nothing fake. No difference at all from the one i bought in the store. I compared the stitching even down to the fight strap and its the same. OMG hells yeah! Now i can afford to get Gonch and Talbot without even spending 100 bucks. This is the most amazing deal ever. Thank you chinese connection thank you! I would never have dropped 300 on a real Talbot jersey. Who would? 40 bucks though is a steal! Yes im aware they could be stolen haha

MouthGuard said...

@Holly Jameson: That fat tuba virtuoso is one of my boyfriends. :) Isn't he just a star? Can you imagine him tooting the shit out of the national anthems? Again, if I ran the NHL... But you need to research the perfect "anthem" for Team Douche and get back to us! I'm decision-making challenged. What to do, what to do...

@mitchmcquaide: I'm SO GLAD you said it first! I'm ashamed to admit at first I thought it was an older pic of Disco Dan instead of Kronwall. Then I saw the fucking sardine sandwich portrait and I slapped myself. Which reminds me: Paul Maurice needs to stop copying Dan's look, already. Bitch needs a beatdown from Dan. The bookworm glasses don't make Maurice look smarter or "more Asian," as one of my Korean friends always jokes. I'll bet Maurice doesn't even need glasses. And I thought I saw Maurice wearing a pair of Dan's cufflinks, as well. NOT COOL!

Bradford said...

So how did I get this lucky on my 40 buck jersey? Was it:

A)sweatshop labor.
B) stolen from factory or truck.
C) taken by factory worker and sold.

I am not understanding how i got a brand new jersey with all the tags and everything else matching up with one i bought in the store. This isn't a replica. This is the real deal 300 buck jersey for 40 bucks. How could this be? Should i feel guilty? Is some lil girl named ling ling working 23 hours a day to give me this great deal? Part of me feels bad. However since i have purchased 5 300 buck jerseys in the past 15 years i don't feel too bad. It gets addicting. At 300 a pop that kept me in check but for 40 bucks i'm doing cartwheels as i order a gonchar and talbot jersey. Maybe Kunitz too. Maybe flower. I dunno. At 40 bucks can you blame me for wanting the whole team? I'm just still so blown away at the price. I feel bad if ling ling is whats giving me this opportunity though!

Bradford said...

Sidney is a PIMP! How sweet is it to see him work on a line with all star wingers? Can you imagine how many points he would score a year with people like Nash and Iginla on his line? It's a beautiful thing. It really is. I am USA USA all the way but if we have to lose i want Sid to win because this is a treat! He looks great out there! Plus if sid wins gold don't you think he will take all that energy and drive the pens to a 4th cup? I think this experience will only sharpen his game and raise his play to yet another level!

 
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