So, the draft party in Columbus was quite the experience for PH and crew.
Huge thanks to The Hockey Junkies for carting our asses to Ohio and buying Timbits for everyone.
Without them, we wouldn't have had the opportunity to be on a locker room tour and just randomly turn around to see Steve Mason all up in our business trying to get away from the legions of men congratulating him on his Calder.
If we are ever that close to Steve Mason again we'll probably experience massive heart attacks and die.
He really shouldn't sneak up on people like that.
R.J. Umberger was there. So was Jared Boll. All were creeping around the arena wearing gay flip flops. It was great.
However, we'd like to present a brief open letter to the Blue Jackets organization:
DEAR BLUE JACKETS ORGANIZATION:
Just because your team moved up from #26 to #21 after blowing your chance at #16 doesn't mean that you should kick everyone out of the arena before the fucking round is over.
And by "everyone" we mean the 10 people who stayed that the radio announcers called the "diehards." Srsly. We had a draft to watch.
Other than that, though, we have nothing but great words for the people at Nationwide. The locker room tours were a great idea and the nifty little draft sheets that they provided for people to fill out were really fun.
And we got Timbits.
As you all know, we drafted defenseman Simon Despres. He's considered a good positional defenseman and is smart with the puck.
We also enjoy how French he is. And his awkward little crooked smile.
Also acquired are Ulf Samuelsson's kid, Philip (D), and Andy Bathgate's grandson, Andy Bathgate, a centerman who plays for Belleville.
Not to leave out Alex Velischek, son of Randy Velischek, also a defenseman.
Ben Hanowski, RW
Nick Petersen, RW
Viktor Ekbom, D
Look them up. We're retarded.
Some photos have surfaced of the Red Wings cleaning out their locker room on June 15.
Oh, shit. That last one just snuck in there. It's what the Penguins were doing on June 15. We apologize for the inconvenience.
(Sorry, sorry. It hasn't gotten old yet.)
The Flyers got Chris Pronger yesterday and gave up Joffrey Lupul, Luca Sbisa, and some picks/kittens.
They're just stocking up on crazy motherfuckers in case the arena needs protection during a nuclear holocaust.
Like. . .Chris Pronger in our division.
We don't know what this means, but it can't be good.
We're still confident about keeping Rob Scuderi. This article helps.
Conkblock won't be a Wing next season. Should he sign with the Flyers to back up Ray Emery and play in the Winter Classic?
The Isles sold $79,000 worth of NEW season ticket packages and $15,000 worth of Tavares merchandise in the hour after Tavares was drafted. Boy Canada is a very greasy little commodity. 6 times a year. Playing against Johnny and and the very lovely Kyle Okposo might actually make Isles games interesting. They might be a playoff team one day, which means someone in the Atlantic is going down. The Rangers might implode or something. This could be fun!
Other than that. . .things are pretty quiet.
Counting down the days to Wednesday.
btw, we thought we were Team Jacob, until we found out he's in league with the Red Wings.
what the fuck, man?
EDIT: RIP Billy Mays, via tPB. More than Farrah and MJ does he deserve your respect. Pittsburgh pride over here.